Lenten Devotion 1 - What are we Giving Up?

On this second day of Lent, we continue our centering, prayer and devotion.  Many have chosen to give something up for the next forty days until the rise of Eastertide.  Choosing to give something up has long been a way of showing special devotion or respect to our Beloved, or of re-aligning ourselves with Christ's purpose here on the earth.

I recall one year while I was in college that I gave up worrying for Lent.  This took a great deal of energy at first, demanding a large portion of my attention and resolve.  I worked very hard to let go of my need to control the various aspects of my life.  

My marriage, my studies, my work, my ministry, my future, my health, my family -- all of these things were often on my mind swirling in a jumbled mess of worry, chaos or despair.  Each one had to be intentionally released into the arms of One who Loves.  It was sometimes a moment-by-moment act of trust and letting go.

This was incredibly difficult at first.  Somehow in my daily living my mental hands had become like the rubbery tentacles of a giant octopus, tightly wound around each particular detail of my life, then suctioned on with super glue.  I wasn't prepared for the pain in the process that came in the beginning as each individual suction cup was pried away from its treasured possession.  The act could be likened to the detailed work of getting a sweet kitty's claws unstuck from a dearly loved crocheted blanket.  Each fiber in the yarn and each individual claw has to be handled carefully so that the blanket and the kitty both remain in tact.

Photo by TheoZomB

As unprepared as I was for the difficulty of this fast in the beginning, I also was not nearly prepared for how much it would become second nature by the end of the Lenten journey.  I did not realize how much my prayer life would shift after that Lenten fast from worry.  Years later, this devotion still has an impact on my life.

So, when I read today that Pope Francis has a different sort of fast in mind for devoted followers of Christ across the globe, I paid attention.  I have often been finding myself struck by this leader's wisdom and grace.  Today is no different.  Followers of Christ are encouraged to give up indifference for Lent -- to use this time to connect with the pain and suffering of the world.  If you read my Ash Wednesday post, you will see how closely aligned he and I are in this perspective.  I greatly appreciate the way Christopher Hale of Time writes of Pope Francis' invitation:

"...when we fast from this indifference, we can began to feast on love. In fact, Lent is the perfect time to learn how to love again. Jesus—the great protagonist of this holy season—certainly showed us the way. In him, God descends all the way down to bring everyone up. In his life and his ministry, no one is excluded."

Fasting opens us up for feasting.  Lent is the perfect time to learn how to love again.  Truly, it is a time to remember who we are.

So, dear ones, what are you giving up for Lent?  Or what are you taking on?  No matter what it is, my prayer is that our Lenten devotions may bring us closer to our Creator, closer to one another and closer to the whole of creation.  May this be a time of letting go of our old ways of being; may it be a time of remembering who we are.

What's in our Eyes?

I've been writing more often in my prayer blog lately than on here, but today's awful events bring me back into the realm of violence, theology and questions.  I posted in the prayer blog about a shooting that happened in the nearby Clackamas Town Center earlier this week.  Now, only a few days later we hear about a terrible tragedy in Connecticut.

Images, sound clips and heart-breaking accounts of today's events leave us feeling numb and hopeless.  A steady stream of political posturing and religious rants have been flooding my Facebook news feed all day.  It is sad how quickly we can manipulate a tragedy into a tool for our own agendas.  We have violence towards one another in our eyes.

We have a hard time simply sighing as a nation and grieving together.  We are immediately looking for someone or something to blame.  (Yes, I include myself in this.  I said, "we".  Although I refrained from posting throughout the day, my mind went all over, too...)  We have destruction in our eyes.

Tonight, though, as the reactions begin to simmer down and the soul searching begins, I am reminded that perfect love casts out fear.

A Zombie's Look at the Important Things

Yesterday marks one month since I moved to Portland from Seattle.  This is my childhood home, where both my husband and I were born and raised.

It has certainly been a full month with lots of transitions! Plenty of mental acrobatics have come about as my internal maps of the area have been accessed and modified from the shifting roads during our seven years away. And since it's taken my MEW several weeks to get transferred down here as well, we've been adjusting both to life apart at first and now to life together again.

Our kitties are settling in well and very much enjoying being on the first floor where they have the ability, (much to our dismay and, at times, amusement) to dart out the door onto the nearby grass as we arrive home with arms full from work. It's nice to have a washer and dryer in our unit - we only had this once in our 10 years of married life - and the cats are learning that these are not scary sounds. Our apartment is mostly unpacked, (although there are still a few boxes in the office/guest room yet to be opened) and we have given several crate fulls to Goodwill now that we have time to sort our stuff.

We are releasing the hoarding zombie-like tendency so prevalent in our society.

Feeling Dry?

Grace and peace to you, dear ones!

At several points this year, while clambering to and from various gatherings and trying to push myself through the final quarters in my seminary career, I have found myself feeling a little dry, (I wrote a little earlier in the summer about this very thing) and wondering where our Beloved was.  I felt as though I was in the midst of a terrible storm of thunder and lightning but was lacking the refreshing, cooling downpour of grace upon my thirsty soul.  As one born and raised in the pacific-northwest where rains are quite abundant, this is saying something!

On account of my geographical location, I don't often identify with the imagery of desert sands and arid places; the landscape surrounding me is usually quite lush and green.  However, during certain points in my life, and particularly poignantly in the last few months of seminary, I have had very strong sensations of being unceasingly thirsty, dry and in a time of waiting for our Beloved to come and take some powerful action.  In these times, this vision of Ezekiel is particularly profound:

"Feeling Dry" - Photo by Trista Wynne

Zombies Love Music!

In just a couple of weeks, the zombie hoard of Seattle will descend upon the Fremont neighborhood with a vengeance!  Each year we don our make-up and pick out new outfits to bring the Guiness Book of World Records home once more, striving to bring thousands of zombies into one place at the same time.

There's always awesome musicians there to entertain the masses, great photo opportunities and plenty of time to get your groove on.  Our Red, White & Dead gatherings wouldn't be complete without a gigantic dance to Michael Jackson's "Thriller"!  Seattle Zombies love to shuffle to the beat!

Here's a slideshow of our "Red, White & Dead" photos from 2011:

Dust and Ashes: Mortality, Ash Wednesday & Collective Memory

Fellow zombies attempting to remember our Identity,

Yesterday we began one of the most intense seasons in the Family year.  As our heads were marked with ashen crosses, we exhaled and sighed, remembering that humankind was created from the dust of the earth and animated by the Breath of our Creator.  We all know, don't we, the pain that comes with the return to the earth?  Death hardly ever comes easily or quickly.  Very few people simply drift from this life into the next without a fight.  We live in a society seemingly hell-bent on retaining animation as long as possible.

Ash Wednesday, dear brothers and sisters, reminds us that we will return to the earth.  But this is not the end, dear ones.  Oh no, this is not the end.

Light to the Ends of the Earth...

Or should it be light from the ends of the earth?

One of the books that I am reading for class this term (which just began yesterday -- welcome to my blog during the school year!) is The New Global Mission by Samuel Escobar.  Thus far I am a little over three chapters into the reading, but am finding quite a strong response welling up within, so here you go...

A major focus in Escobar's book is a challenge to rethink what it means to participate in Kingdom growth.  One of the sad truths about the way our culture often does mission work is that we focus on growing churches or denominations.  Escobar challenges us to evaluate how we are equipping women across the board as well as the oppressed or marginalized groups in the third world for ministry and mission. Allowing the voices of women, children, oppressed and marginalized peoples throughout the third world would curb our tendency toward top-heavy, or what Escobar refers to as “culture Christianity” (p. 59).  This reading, and indeed this class on Church and Mission in a Global Context comes at a fairly critical point in my vocational consideration.

As a woman who has felt the calling to ministry since I was a young child, I have found in recent years that the three denominations I have opened ordination conversations with are more interested in promoting their version of theology than of making disciples of Jesus the Christ.  The “non-denoms” that my husband and I have been visiting lately are showing that they are no different in this regard.  It seems that most churches do not recognize their neighbors down the street, and they either overtly or show through subtle hints and membership requirements that they are the true church.  Now, I could be wrong, but I doubt that this was Jesus' call in what we call the great commission.  My point in writing this is not to condemn these churches as they currently stand, but rather to acknowledge that I see things differently and I would like to see us open to other ways of doing church while all seeking to love and serve the same Lord.

If you have been following my blog up to this point, you probably know that I am currently seeking a community of grass-roots origin, and wondering what my role will be in such a group.  Having been called to a pastoral role from a young age, yet finding myself clashing with the current culture of the western church, I have felt fairly alone in my seminary studies despite being surrounded by fellow seminarians trying to find their way in the Kingdom.  I did not know until recently how beneficial my willingness to share my struggles and spiritual lament has been to my fellow seminarians and professors.  Perhaps it is best to work through these issues together as we each, in our own contexts, strive to remember what it is to live to the fullest measure.

My husband and I have had some experience with a smaller community, but since it sprouted forth out of a typical congregation, we found that for most who were involved it was simply an interesting experiment, and many have returned to their “old ways” of doing church.  Remember several months ago when we looked at the bio-hazard symbol and my icon found at the top of this site?  The inward focus which was not part of our Lord's original gift of life has overtaken us, and it often infects our churches.

I strive to fight that infection with the help of Sophia-Spirit but, like the apostle Paul, I find that it is a difficult battle to wage.  Still, like Escobar, we are looking for a different, outward-focused way to follow Christ.  He says that our passions may be re-ignited by interaction with the two-thirds world (p. 69) and the missionaries who are flowing forth with a “new expression of Christianity” (p. 15).  I hope that he is right because I have been greatly disheartened by the processes and requirements for the western church leadership and recognition of ministers.  Perhaps the light that we need cannot be found within our walls.  It might not be the ends of the earth that needs the light; it might just be that the Light needs to come from the far corners of the earth so we can find our way back to the side of our Beloved and live to the fullest measure.

There’s nothing easy about saying goodbye to an old way of thinking.  Thus far, Escobar has not set the conditions to allow for proper lament, but my life has.  My journey leading up to, and throughout, my seminary years thus far has brought me to a place of great transition and, although there is room for lament, in the midst of it is potential for great joy.  One of the videos we watched for our discussion this week spoke of "giving up".  Although it was focused on giving up our resources so that others might have greater potential to thrive in the mission field, there is a different way that we may need to “give up” as well.  I know that for me, this means giving up an old way of seeing “pastor” as a job title and instead embracing a pastoral way of living no matter my occupation.  What might it mean for you?

Zombies Brewing

"The Taste of Blood & Brew"
Photo by Trista

My husband and I just finished watching Beer Wars -- a documentary about the beer industry and what it takes for independent brewers to get any traction.  What a wretched business!

Don't get me wrong; I very much enjoy beer.  I support the small companies in our area and buy niche' products when I can.  My irritation comes from the knowledge that the beer giants do everything they can to eliminate their competitors.  What is worse, though, is that Americans buy into their marketing campaigns. 

Even worse than mindless consumption is the devouring of our politicians' brains by this (and the other two) corporate giants.  By taking their money, our senators and house representatives pledge to support these beer companies' interests, and they all work together to keep the small, delicious companies out of our reach.  There is a question posed at the end of the movie.  Will we have access to the beers that we like, or will we allow the corporate giants to tell the government what we should be able to drink?

I think that we have this question in many arenas, not just in the brewing world.  It boils down to whether we buy into the marketing campaign or whether we choose to employ our brains.  Every dollar that we spend sends some message to someone.

Pride & the Apocalypse: Are Zombies Better than the Living?

"Night Life" - Photo by Matt Wynne

When I am in school from September through halfway into June, homework sometimes (fairly often, actually) takes over my night life.  This leaves very little time for television.  When shows that we're intrigued with are on, they're usually recorded and saved for later.  The summer is "later" for me, and my husband and I are catching up on the AMC series The Walking Dead.  We're taking it one episode at a time and allowing each one to percolate a bit and fuel our evening banter and creativity. 

Who are Your Heroes?

This is Balla the dog.  On several occasions, she has been known to sprout pretend wings and soar around the house helping those in need.  "To the rescue!" the child I nanny shouts, and then off they go to rescue some other toy or pet who appears to be in grave peril.

Yesterday, the preschooler I nanny was talking about their heroes.  The child's mother was listed in the number one spot, "because she helps people, and that's what heroes do".  This woman is a wise, gifted, naturopathic doctor, and she does help a lot of people.  I agree.  She is a hero!

A short while later, the child also said that I was a hero, too, because I help the child.  I am very blessed to have such affirmation given in my job without request!  What a gift this child's simple observation was for me.

Mortal Combat

No, I'm not talking about the video game; (otherwise I'd have spelled combat with a K) instead, I'm talking about combat in the mortal, or physical, realm.  My husband and I just finished watching The Fighter.  In this movie, a boxer overcomes some intense personal and professional struggles in order to attain the world welterweight title in the 1980s.

Photo by Trista Wynne

I have to say that I have an incredible respect for hand-to-hand combat.  One of the sad trends in zombie movies and books is an intense focus on combat from a distance.  You want to keep the enemy away from you and kill them before you can even recognize their (former) humanity.  As my husband and I slowly work our way through The Walking Dead, (I was attending class when it was on, so we recorded it to watch during summer break) I am delighted to see that zombies are treated humanely. 

A Simple Zombie Credo

The following was just posted in response to a comment on ZombieTheology.  I invite you to read the post here, and then to continue reading this one.

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Dear Sonny ~

You said,

“Zombie Theology isn’t about finding cool walking dead references in the Scriptures (we’ll have fun with some of that, who can resist?), it’s about the disease. How it’s contracted,how it’s spread from host to host. How they can be stopped (got to shoot them in the Soul, their head) and the most important question of all, how do we cure ourselves once we are bitten by the overwhelming Zombie Army?”

Here, dear one, is the gospel: we don’t have the cure. God does. The cure came in the form of Jesus Christ and is being distributed by the Holy Spirit breathed into the world as Jesus breathed His last. Jesus came to resurrect our imaginations, to give our brain-dead appetites something other than each other to gnaw on. One day, all of creation and all of humanity will remember the goodness and freedom it was crafted with. We look forward to that day.

You are right when you say that many Christians are acting in ways that resemble zombies. We are part of a world that is infected with the virus, (or the toxin, or the radiation, whatever imagery we find in zombie literature can be applied). We’re born into it, we’re raised by infected beings, and we’re exposed to it every day. The zombie infection is everywhere. It’s what gives all humans (and other animals, for that matter) a tendency towards violence, self-preservation, destruction of others and other behaviors that are not conducive to societal uplifting.

Are we Human?

In the zombie apocalypse the first thing most people think of is the violence of survival.  Simply getting by day to day is exhausting in the days, weeks and even months following a disaster of any degree. Imagine then, one where our family and friends have completely lost their sense of humanity.  It may cause us to loose our own sense of self as well.

Consider your zombie survival plan.  Our survival kits, particularly those geared for adults, almost always hold a wide variety of weapons and martial arts manuals.  We want to become as efficient as the enemy in killing.  Murder is never very far from our brains.  This is particularly true in times of war, upheaval or, for our purposes in this discussion, in the time of the zombie apocalypse.